Living realistically and shaking off fantasy.

Hey all,

I’ve had another of those epiphany type experiences again. In my struggles with Bipolar, I find the most frustrating thing is trying to control my emotions and quiet the voices in my head. But maybe I’m not supposed to control anything. It’s all part of my nature, and really who I am. I think somethings in life your not meant to understand nor control.

So quite simply, I have to be happy with who I am, and take things as they come. That part will be the hardest I think. Because whenever I become emotionally invested in something, I tend to either become obsessive or I keep it at a distance.

I guess I just want a happy medium.

God I hope that’s possible. Because I don’t want to remain so seperated for as long as I have. It’s safer on my own, but I’m hoping for a real human connection, and finding that happy place if possible.

Not one single thing or person can make me happy, but they sure can help. I can’t have what I really want, but I think wanting things is the problem. So I guess I’ll have to make do with what I have and who I am.

Stay true to myself, those I love and my quest. The risks are worth the potential rewards.

Nothing good happens overnight.

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